In June 2016 I was almost at the end of earning my MFA. In the midst of the closing of the school quarter, I was torn because I wanted to see my daughter in a play at school. I decided to "sneak" away from my program to quickly see my daughter's play, committing to driving right back to school the moment the play was over. It seemed like a simple enough plan...right?
So, I made it on time to see her play. It was outside, it was hotter than hell, and I found myself helplessly leaning against this stucco pole to keep from passing out. That's how hot it was.
Out of nowhere, this Asian guy appears and decides to stand about 2 inches from me. When I turned to tell him to give me a little space, he sneezed in my face. I kid you not.
The women I was standing next to all dispersed like roaches. I was so disgusted that I immediately moved to the opposite side of the courtyard.
And I knew I was going to get sick. I just knew it.
When the outside play was over, the Asian dude left. He didn't greet any child that was in the play. He didn't have any other family members with him. He just...left. (As I look back today, I realize just how suspicious all of this really was.)
I was able to spend the night at my house before heading back to school the next day. On my way back, I started feeling really sick...like flu/cold sick. I stopped at a 7-11 and asked the guy for every cold and flu medicine he had behind the counter because I knew I'd be down for the count.
Low and behold, I was. I was in Palm Springs and it was 120 degrees. I felt so cold that I opened the door, letting the dry heat in. I went into the bathtub, running the hottest water possible. It was so hot that my skin turned bright red. I was so lethargic that I couldn't get out of the bathtub for hours.
Thinking back...I believe I had an earlier strand of Covid. I had mostly the same symptoms including a fever. I had never been that sick in my entire life, before or since. (Ask any nurse or doctor who knows their salt and they'll tell you Covid has been around for a long time!)
Anyway, I was describing this story to my students in an email and I had this rude lady tell me that I should "apologize" for writing such an insulting email about the Asian guy who sneezed in my face!
Say what??!!
Apologize for stating the facts about what happened that day? Apologize because I mentioned that he was Asian and I shouldn't have said that at all? I should have just said "a guy" instead of "an Asian guy"?
And who am I supposed to apologize to? You, lady? About how I "insulted" the rude guy who sneezed in my face by...telling everybody that he sneezed in my face?
What the hell??!!
Why is everybody so freaking OFFENDED by EVERYTHING these days? Why is everybody constantly DEMANDING APOLOGIES for the most stupidest sh**??!!
Somebody says something on the news you don't like. Get offended. Demand an apology.
Somebody is wearing a t-shirt you don't like. Get offended. Demand an apology.
Somebody colors their hair a color you don't like. Get offended. Demand an apology.
Please!! Give it a rest already!
For people like that, I have this to say: GROW A PAIR and stop being a freaking cry baby all the time.
How can ANYONE expect to be successful -- forget about the world of business and investing -- in the REAL WORLD...by doing all this cry-baby "being-offended" all the time?? Isn't it A LOT OF WORK and energy to be offended, mad, and in a state of frenzy until you get empty apologies for stupid stuff that bothers you??
To be offended...that's a choice! Yes. You can CHOOSE to be offended! You can CHOOSE NOT to be offended! It's really that simple.
Recently I was going through some of my YouTube videos on my channel and somebody made a comment several months ago about how I sound like a 10-year-old boy on the video. At first I felt that sense of wanting to get pissed off but a few seconds later I just laughed. I actually thought it was pretty funny. Maybe it's because I've heard that comment before...from my own daughter! But she didn't say I sounded like a 10-year old boy. She's told me a few times that I actually look like a boy in junior high school when I wear my jeans and skater shoes with my short hair and no make-up. I'd rather look and sound like a young boy than look and sound like an over-the-hill Big Ass Bertha any day of the week!
I realized at that moment: I CHOSE NOT to be offended. I CHOSE NOT to get pissed off about something so stupid that it was laughable. And then I chose to laugh...because it was funny.
For those of you who are choosing to be offended about the most nonsensical things, maybe you can start right now by trying my strategy: CHOOSING NOT to be offended. Try it out once or twice. You can always go back to being offended by anything and everything in 20 minutes if you'd like.
Life is not all that serious. Trust me. There's a lot of things to get your feathers all ruffled up over...but receiving an email from somebody about how somebody sneezed in my face and got me sick shouldn't be on the list of things to make you "offended" or upset. And since it is, perhaps consider busying yourself with something a little more productive. Like -- I don't know -- maybe pulling yourself out of debt? Making some money for yourself? Building a successful business? (Those are just ideas. If you don't like them, you can go back to wasting your time being "offended" all day as your full-time job, if you so choose.)
As for the rest of you, I have something I want you to check out. It's about something CRITICAL you may want to consider doing if you want to start CASHING IN on our economic demise.
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See you at the top!
Your mentor,
Monica Main